NOT SURE WHAT YOU BELIEVE
Spiritual but not religious: a plain guide
What the words mean, what people actually do, and how to find each other. No sermon, and no test at the end.
Maybe you ticked "spiritual but not religious" on some form and weren't sure what that means. Maybe you grew up going to church and stopped. Maybe you never went, and you're curious anyway.
You've got company. In the 2021 census, more than a third of Canadians reported no religious affiliation. That number doesn't say what anyone does on a Sunday. It does mean you needn't feel strange about this.
What does spiritual but not religious mean?
Most people mean this: I care about meaning or connection, and I don't belong to an organized faith. That's about it. There's no membership and no agreed list of beliefs.
The other words get mixed up constantly, so here's a quick sort. These are plain descriptions, and people inside each group would add plenty.
Pick a word
Religion
Usually an organized tradition with shared beliefs, practices and a community. It has a history and, often, a building.
Spirituality
The personal side of looking for meaning or connection. It can sit inside a religion or completely outside one.
Agnostic
Someone who says we don't or can't know whether a god exists.
Atheist
Someone without a belief in gods. It says nothing about what else they care about.
Humanist
Someone who builds their ethics around people and reason, without relying on the supernatural.
Witchcraft
A set of practices people follow in many ways. Some do it as a craft with no religion attached. Wicca is a modern religion that came out of England in the 1950s, and it's only one branch.
New age
A loose umbrella of modern ideas that took off around the 1970s, often including astrology and crystals. Very few people call themselves this.
What people actually do
It's less mysterious than the words suggest. Most of it is small and repeated.
- A walk with no phone, at the same time each week.
- A journal, or one line a night.
- Marking the seasons or the new year with something simple.
- A shelf with a photo, a stone and a candle. This guide to a small sacred space shows how little it takes.
- A sound bath, a tarot night or a meditation class.
- A stone in a pocket as a reminder to stop for a second.
Atheist and still curious
Welcome. You're allowed to want the practice and skip the belief. Sitting quietly, gathering with people and marking a hard year all work fine as human things to do.
If you're also wondering whether any of this is real, our skeptic's guide gives you the straight version. Nothing at the shop needs you to sign on to anything.
If you miss what you grew up with
Leaving is one thing. Missing the rhythm is another. Plenty of people miss the same room, the same faces, the singing, and someone noticing when they're away.
The useful question is which part you miss. That points to where to look.
What do you miss most?
The people
Look for anything weekly or monthly with the same crowd: a community choir, a volunteer shift, a meal program, a running or walking group. Regular matters more than the topic.
The quiet
Try a meditation group or a quiet place in Kitchener. Sound baths at the shop are another option, and you mostly just listen. Here's what a sound bath is.
The ritual
Keep the shape and choose your own content. Same day, same chair, same candle from our shelf or your kitchen drawer. Mark the holidays you still love, in your own way.
The big questions
Look for talks and reading groups. Humanist groups and Unitarian congregations both gather people around questions like these, and Kitchener has a Unitarian congregation. Our Soulful Soirée talks are another way in.
How to find others
People rarely find each other by searching for a label. They find each other by showing up more than once.
- Pick one recurring thing. Go three times before you decide.
- Look at the local boards. Libraries, community centres and yoga studios all post what's on.
- Come to something at the shop. Our events page lists sound baths, tarot and oracle nights, workshops and talks. Some are free and some are paid.
Questions people ask
What's the difference between spirituality, religion, witchcraft and new age?
Religion is usually an organized tradition with shared beliefs and community. Spirituality is the personal search for meaning. Witchcraft is a set of practices, with or without a religion. New age is a loose umbrella of modern ideas.
I don't believe in God but I believe in energy. Is there a word for that?
"Spiritual but not religious" is the phrase most people use. Some say agnostic, and plenty use no label at all. You don't need a word to be allowed to look for others.
Can I be an atheist and still be spiritual?
Yes, if you want to use the word. Plenty of people want practices without a belief system: quiet time, seasonal markers, gathering with others. Atheist only describes what you don't believe about gods.
I stopped going to church but I miss the ritual and community. What do people like me do instead?
A lot of people work out what they miss, then look for that part. That might be a choir, a volunteer shift, a meditation group or a monthly event. Same faces, same room, on a regular rhythm.
Where do spiritual but not religious people find each other near Kitchener?
Try recurring things: meditation groups, library talks, choirs and shop events. Ours are listed on our events page, and some are free. You can come once to see if it fits.
Where to next
Where the curious become connected.
Come say hi
The easiest way to figure any of this out is in person. Find us at 396-B Victoria Street North in Kitchener. No pressure to believe a thing.